Destination for rants, for raves, for self, and for the people who cared about the puny one in the big big world.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Cohort problem
We may earn more but we don't spend less. And that is just one of the basis behind cohort problem. Or in layman terms, generation gap.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Sometimes
Sometimes I don't know what's more triggering. The fact that you're not feeling your best and you know you are trying to avoid it. Or the fact that you are already not feeling your best and the people around you just try to push it.
Friday, December 09, 2011
Running
"A city of runners", that's the thought that came to me as I ran the Standard Chartered Half Marathon almost a week ago. This is a delayed post, because the reflections seemed to be delayed too. I'm not getting much from the 21KM run. I'm now still a little stumped, stuck, emotionless about the run. Just as I felt after the run. I didn't feel like that in my previous 10KM runs, but I felt like this with 21KM. Goodness knows what I might be thinking after a full marathon. Truth be told, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be thinking much, the pain of the gruelling 42KM would have overrode my intellect.
It's amazing to see so many people running the distance. What's their reason to run? I'm not sure. But somehow this whole running adventure, from the moment when the horn sounded at 630am sharp, to the point when the dead tired feet sweep across the finishing line, just didn't seem to be a physical activity only.
I ran, like everybody else. Always running for something, to somewhere, but not too sure where. This city of runners, a city where I used to be part of that human race, of which I'm constantly trying to get out. It's not easy, not when everyone in the whole city are runners. It's suffocating to walk or stop without getting hit at points you hate. The runners may jab and mock you unknowingly. Sometimes knowingly. The crux here is to embrace comfort in the hits. Until you find a not so popular race opening itself to you. Then you realised the race which majority ran is not the only race you know. It's when you realized you are a runner once again, running a race, that's not too much like the usual running, or the usual race.
Once the horn sounded, I move. I continued to jog on the spot even when the mob of runners came to a halt at a junction leading to Tanjong Beach. I became remotely aware that I'm a runner at heart. (If you know me, you know I'm not referring to physical running.) I just like to move, to move ahead of everyone else, no matter how small my steps may be. As long as I'm moving, I'm making progress. Of course, at this point, I'm not making any progress in distance. But I'm making progress in endurance, the unwillingness to stop even when circumstances halt. Endurance is a good word. The flip side, is obstinance. The inability to relent for god knows what reason. In my world, it only goes to show that I hate stopping. Not even willing to take a rest. I'm automated to move, and I want it that way, but does not necessarily means I like it. I'd love a rest but I'm too scared to rest. Perhaps an inward need. But not to worry, I am changing.
I often have this fear of lagging behind others. Looking at my friends now, I realised I'm late and early at the same time. Different perspectives. Wenyao was running alongside me most of the time. For the first time, we ran together. An activity which I've always preferred alone. Most of the times he was faster, but I always knew where he would be if I finally caught up with him. Which I eventually did. I did lag behind, but I caught up, in my own pace and my own time.
I didn't have a reason to run. Or perhaps an inspiring reason to run. I wanted to run just because. Just because I didn't run a half marathon before. Perhaps I just wanted a fulfilling 3 hour on a Sunday morning. Or perhaps I just wanted to complete a journey I didn't think much of. Or maybe I'm just running because everybody else seems to be doing it, and I wanted to make sure I wasn't one who lacked the experience when it becomes a table topic. Kiasu, you say. I'm sure I am. I'm a Singaporean. And damn proud of it.
I probably can't remember what I experienced in the run. Maybe I wasn't present to what was happening within. Or maybe my brain was just fried from the running. Nonetheless, I've still earned great lessons without remembering the true experience.
1) The walk to the destination is worse than the run - Yes, I'm talking about the pain once you stop running.
2) There's always a loved one out there who's running ahead of you, but waiting for you to catch up.
3) Not everyone is running to a destination they want to reach
4) Not everyone knows what's the destination to reach
5) As Confucius say: The journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step, and an add-on from me: Which journey of a thousand miles would you want to start with that single step?
It's amazing to see so many people running the distance. What's their reason to run? I'm not sure. But somehow this whole running adventure, from the moment when the horn sounded at 630am sharp, to the point when the dead tired feet sweep across the finishing line, just didn't seem to be a physical activity only.
I ran, like everybody else. Always running for something, to somewhere, but not too sure where. This city of runners, a city where I used to be part of that human race, of which I'm constantly trying to get out. It's not easy, not when everyone in the whole city are runners. It's suffocating to walk or stop without getting hit at points you hate. The runners may jab and mock you unknowingly. Sometimes knowingly. The crux here is to embrace comfort in the hits. Until you find a not so popular race opening itself to you. Then you realised the race which majority ran is not the only race you know. It's when you realized you are a runner once again, running a race, that's not too much like the usual running, or the usual race.
Once the horn sounded, I move. I continued to jog on the spot even when the mob of runners came to a halt at a junction leading to Tanjong Beach. I became remotely aware that I'm a runner at heart. (If you know me, you know I'm not referring to physical running.) I just like to move, to move ahead of everyone else, no matter how small my steps may be. As long as I'm moving, I'm making progress. Of course, at this point, I'm not making any progress in distance. But I'm making progress in endurance, the unwillingness to stop even when circumstances halt. Endurance is a good word. The flip side, is obstinance. The inability to relent for god knows what reason. In my world, it only goes to show that I hate stopping. Not even willing to take a rest. I'm automated to move, and I want it that way, but does not necessarily means I like it. I'd love a rest but I'm too scared to rest. Perhaps an inward need. But not to worry, I am changing.
I often have this fear of lagging behind others. Looking at my friends now, I realised I'm late and early at the same time. Different perspectives. Wenyao was running alongside me most of the time. For the first time, we ran together. An activity which I've always preferred alone. Most of the times he was faster, but I always knew where he would be if I finally caught up with him. Which I eventually did. I did lag behind, but I caught up, in my own pace and my own time.
I didn't have a reason to run. Or perhaps an inspiring reason to run. I wanted to run just because. Just because I didn't run a half marathon before. Perhaps I just wanted a fulfilling 3 hour on a Sunday morning. Or perhaps I just wanted to complete a journey I didn't think much of. Or maybe I'm just running because everybody else seems to be doing it, and I wanted to make sure I wasn't one who lacked the experience when it becomes a table topic. Kiasu, you say. I'm sure I am. I'm a Singaporean. And damn proud of it.
I probably can't remember what I experienced in the run. Maybe I wasn't present to what was happening within. Or maybe my brain was just fried from the running. Nonetheless, I've still earned great lessons without remembering the true experience.
1) The walk to the destination is worse than the run - Yes, I'm talking about the pain once you stop running.
2) There's always a loved one out there who's running ahead of you, but waiting for you to catch up.
3) Not everyone is running to a destination they want to reach
4) Not everyone knows what's the destination to reach
5) As Confucius say: The journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step, and an add-on from me: Which journey of a thousand miles would you want to start with that single step?